I wish my boyfriend was more affectionate! You’re definitely not alone in that sentiment. Many women feel exactly the same way you do. They’re with a man they’re completely crazy about but he’s just not all that comfortable sharing his emotions in a physical way. If you’re like those women you long to have him reach out to grab your hand and you wish he’d just kiss you out of nowhere sometimes. You’ve talked to him about it but to no avail. Perhaps you’ve come to accept the fact that your guy just won’t ever be more affectionate with you. That’s a bit like throwing in the relationship towel though, don’t you think? You want something you’re not getting from the relationship so why not work to change that? It’s certainly not impossible to get a man to be more affectionate. It’s actually all about encouraging him to do so without applying too much pressure.
In almost all relationships there’s a delicate and unique balance at work. Each person silently takes on a certain role. Typically one individual becomes the giver and their partner becomes the taker. In your relationship you’d probably agree that your boyfriend is the one taking more while you give more. It would at least seem that way in terms of the level of affection you two share. Therefore the solution to the problem is to move the balance over a fair bit. Since you feel that you’re giving too much affection and he’s not giving enough you need to show him, through your actions, how fulfilling it can be to be more affectionate.
One major reason why some men aren’t affectionate is they feel very self conscious about it. They don’t want to hold hands with their girlfriend in public because they feel it’s inappropriate to subject other people to that level of affection. Therefore, you will probably make some headway if you refrain from trying to be affectionate towards him when you two aren’t alone. The next time you two are at your place, reach for his hand. Show him how nice it is to hold hands while you’re watching television or talking. He likely won’t pull away from you in this instance because there aren’t any curious eyes watching you.
Another way to get him to be more affectionate is to subtly drop small hints about how much you care for him. Reach for his shoulder and then whisper in his ear how great he looks today. Or slip a small note in his coat pocket that describes how nice it is to kiss him. Small and innocent gestures like these can really help pull a man out of his shell. Once he sees how great it feels to know how much you care for and desire him, he’ll want to return the favor. Just always be very mindful of how you’re making him feel. If he seems receptive, don’t push him too much. Let him set the pace while you continue to be accepting of whatever affection he shares with you.
Source by Gillian Reynolds