There isn’t one answer to what it means if your husband doesn’t want sex anymore. It’s important to figure out which of the above reasons apply to him. The tendency may be to think the worst: “He isn’t attracted to me,” “He doesn’t love me anymore,” or “He must be cheating.” While any of those could be true, there are other explanations that aren’t so dire.
Sexual challenges are normal. We don’t see this in the media, and people aren’t generally talking about their sexual issues, so we don’t realize how common it is to struggle with sex. And when sex gets difficult, when there’s a chance we can “fail,” when we might end up feeling broken or inadequate, we tend to avoid it. The fact that your husband avoids sex now is most likely rooted in these types of negative consequences.
It’s also common to believe that nothing can revitalize a dreary sex life, that a sexless relationship is hopeless. Many people worry that the lack of sex means their relationship is doomed or that they are facing the rest of their life or marriage without intimacy. But you can work together to understand what’s been happening and to create a sex life that is actually easy and fun for both of you.